It's true!  Valve founder Gabe Newell has recently grown out a beautiful grey beard (no homo).


 If you are having trouble believing this shocking information, I can tell you that I have viewed this beard in person and it IS real.

Sup guys,

I went to Valve Software's offices today and had a good look at some of their stuff.  I also landed a tour for tomorrow, so that'll be pretty cool.  When I get back to the condo, I'll upload some pics and link them on this thread if anyone is interested.  Can't film the tour areas though, I guess that means there's super secret stuff back there.

I see the KF server is starting to fill up during the day.  What difficulty is it on?  Also, I think adding a few custom maps to the rotation, chosen by yours truly (also 1dude and Cody), would spice things up a bit.  No mods though, people want to level here.

Or whatever.  Today is the overly commercialized excuse to gorge yourself with chocolate and request love and attention from others.  Feel free to celebrate it by giving people Dalokahs Bars in TF2 or something.  To be honest, I didn't even know today was a holiday until yesterday when I saw heart-shaped balloons on a restaurant.  Anyways, have fun and don't get too fat.

<3,
UA Staff

I may make a few of these just for fun.  Here's one I just finished:

I don't like my computer.  It's built with bottom-of-the-line, outdated parts and any new games are probably going to be a no-go for me unless I upgrade the stuff quite a bit.  Now I'm not good with computers, or knowing how to put them together/take them apart, but a few weeks ago I went out and got a new graphics card.  Well, turns out there were more complications, and my power supply wasn't powerful enough to handle it, so I guess there's another thing I need to replace.  So any of you who are in the know about these kinds of things, I would assume that would be Dragon and Cold, please give me some advice for possible part upgrades so I can get a good feel for how much I need to save up for a decent upgrade.  Here are my specs (copied straight from Speccy, cause I don't trust myself):

Operating System
    MS Windows Vista Home Premium 64-bit SP1
CPU
    Intel Core 2 Quad Q8200  @ 2.33GHz  
    Yorkfield 45nm Technology
RAM
    8.00 GB Dual-Channel DDR3 @ 531MHz
Motherboard
    PEGATRON CORPORATION Eureka3 (CPU 1)  
Graphics
    SyncMaster (1920x1200@60Hz)
    ATI Radeon HD 4350 (MSI)  
Hard Drives
    733GB Seagate ST3750528AS ATA Device (SATA)  
Optical Drives
    HL-DT-ST DVD-RAM GH40L ATA Device
Audio
    Realtek High Definition Audio

Thanks   :02.47-tranquillity:

30 minutes of my life.  Gone.

That's right, folks.  Jeb has officially pushed out a shiny new update for Minecraft.  What does this mean for you?  Take a look at the change log:

Added enchantments to Bows
New Golden Apple recipe (Uses gold nuggets instead of gold blocks)
56 new language translations, including fictional ones such as Pirate
Slightly smoothed color transitions between biomes
Added beaches
Biomes are slightly more varied
Reduced brewing time to 20 seconds
Added Spawn Eggs to creative (the colors of the eggs even look like the mobs)
Added world type options (currently only super-flat and default)
Removed collision box from ladders
Sheep eat Grass, converting them to Dirt, and regain their Wool again
Fixed collision box on fence gates
Walking on Crops no longer tramples them
Magma Cubes now drop Magma Cream
Leaves now have a slight chance of dropping Red Apples
Bug fixes:
Fixed "Sniper Duel" achievement
Fixed Powered Rail Non-Depowering Bug
Fixed Powered Rail Failure-to-Update on Placement Bug
Bugs:
Major crash bug in the loading screen for some users


There y'all go, have fun with that.  And if any of you happen to bump into Jeb, please remind him that that damn dragon egg still needs hatchin'.  

Happy Crafting and Stuff,
UA Staff

Jeb (@Jeb_) has recently announced on Twitter that the next Minecraft update will be launching later this month.  As some of you know, Jeb has just stepped up as the head Minecraft developer, and has been hard at work adding new language options into the game for those who don't speak english.  Here are some of the official changes so far:

-Dozens of new languages (including Pirate speak and Klingon)
-Faster Brewing and less random enchanting
-Return of beaches!
-Hills/mountains in forest biomes
-Mob spawning eggs in creative mode (no Ender Dragon eggs unfortunately)
-New terrain generation option (Superflat)
-"Fixed" ladders (removed hitbox around the ladders so you don't faceplant into them)
-Fence gates have a smaller hitbox, so you are able to move as close as you can to fences

That's all I can remember for now, although there has been talk of tons of other features that may/may not be worked on soon!

Happy [Insert upcoming festivity here] Assassins!

It's finally upon us! The Holiday season is here, which means it's time to break out your most festive gear for the season. Here are some things to try to get in the spirit

-Change your Minecraft skin to something festive/wintery!
-Start on those holiday-themed TF2 load outs!
-Deck out your steam profile picture with Holiday spirit!
-If possible, GET GIFTS! Your friends will appreciate it, and everyone will hear of your generosity!

On a side note, I would like to address certain actions of hostility and anger within the clan. Please note that this is supposed to be a joyous time for everyone, and making it anything else but that for a fellow member, or anyone, is just plain unacceptable. If someone has made you angry or sad in the past, contact that person and try to put aside your differences, even if it's just for the Holidays. Being angry at somebody, or having someone angry at you, is no way to spend this holiday season. Thanks.

Merry Smissmas
UA Staff

We were designing a new version of the Minecraft room for the Mario Kart map on TF2, and I decided to give everyone a little sneak peak.
[video=youtube;G78ZqzHy2zM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G78ZqzHy2zM[/video]

Hey guys,

For those of you who are interested, I will be attending MineCon on the 18th-19th (this Friday and Saturday) and will try to get on Ventrilo/Steam during the event.  If I am unable to do this, I will definitely be able to get on afterwards each night.  I can't wait to tell everyone about it all.  Here's to me rubbing Notch's belly!

Y'all ready for this?
Humancatpost

Hey guys, just thought I'd remind everyone that my birthday is coming up this Sunday.  I would love it if everyone could take a few seconds out of their day to wish me a happy birthday on that day, cause that's really what makes birthdays cool.  If any of you have a birthday coming up, post it here so we can make you feel appreciated too!

As you may have noticed, Team Fortress 2 may have just started updating [queue spooky wind].  But have no fear, this is simply the Third Annu-Hell Very Scary Scream Fortress Event!  Actually, have lots of fear, because it's absolutely terrifying!  [sound of screaming and ghoulish laughter].  Here's the spine-chilling change log:

Halloween 2011 Event

Viaduct has been haunted and is now... Eyeaduct!
One full multi-piece costume set has been added for each class
Random gifts containing costume pieces drop in Eyeaduct on registered servers
2 new Halloween 2011 achievements
Any unusual hats uncrated during the event will be Halloween-themed
New Halloween-themed items are available in the Mann Co. store, but only for a limited time!
Updated effects for The Cow Mangler 5000
Updated in-game abuse reporting tool to include option for reporting abusive game servers
Added mapcycle_halloween containing all Halloween event maps
Fixed team colors and styles not updating properly in store previews
Fixed bug in reputation trend status display for registered servers
Fixed a problem that could cause repeated stutters after joining a server
Fixed the Spine-Chilling Skull not appearing when equipped by soldiers
New Halloween-themed community-created items submitted to the Workshop are now available in the Mann Co. store!

Undocumented changes

All Ghastly Gibuses have been upgraded to Ghastlier Gibuses. Ghastlier Gibuses have been upgraded to the new Ghastlierest Gibuses.
The Halloween 2010 Noisemakers have been made re-availaible in the MannCo Store
Hitting the Horseless Headless Horsemann now plays a hitsound, as if you had hit a player.
Not giving Humancatpost a free hat will result in your steam account being VAC banned.  Spooky!

Also, I promise to update the UA Event server and the Mario kart server tomorrow morning (if static didn't by then).  I tried tonight, but the server traffic made it utterly impossible.  We will also be running the new map, Eyeaduct, on the Event server so you can kill the new, strangely Terraria like boss.  Enjoy!  [lightning; queue T0$t3D laughing maniacally, then coughing on saliva]

Happy Haunting,
UA Staff

I thought, hey, a lot of our members play Team Fortress 2, so why don't I open up a thread for members to post trade requests and offers!  The community is always the best place to go to find people who aren't stingy item whores, so why not trade with your fellow clan members!

I'll start it out:  I'm looking for a Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtaker and am willing to pay up to 1 refined for it!

Get it?  I said boo instead of two!  Hahaha... Ok then.

Anyways, I guess static told me to work on a festive Halloween Mario Kart map for TF2.  It'd be great if you guys could throw some ideas in this thread.  So far you guys have proven to be very helpful and creative, so this is probably the best place to come.

Hey people,

I just realized that I kinda want to do something with my YouTube channel, take it a new direction, a revamp of sorts.  So I need some ideas of some sort of new content to post!  Right now Its just a few gameplay clips from TF2, Minecraft, etc, so I kinda want to do something new and cool.  Any suggestions?  Make sure it's something you yourself would watch!  You can also check out my channel by clicking on the following emoticon.  :/

Regards,
Humancatpost

Hello there,
I am Humancatpost.  Unfortunately, I seem to have lost my generic copy/paste intro from SpiralGaming, so I have to make this new one, so here it goes.

I'm humancatpost and you all already know me so I don't need this stupid intro.  I'll edit this one if I ever find my old one.  There.  Is that good enough?

Hehe, I was searching around Google and found this little beauty.  This should remind all of us former SG members of one reason we left.

  http://unitedrifles.com/viewtopic.php?t=544&f=2

Many of us have been speculating on whether Notch / Jeb will be  adding a Sky Land/Aether to Minecraft.  In short, yes they are adding one.  But it is not going to be a light-hearted happy place like so many of us thought.  My friends, this new land is called The Ender.  It is indeed a sky world, but as the name suggests, it is the dark home of the Endermen, and the new mob Enderdragon.  This world can be entered (in the future) by repairing an air portal deep within a stronghold (repaired with Eye of Ender).  The Ender and many new features are coming soon to a minecraft.jar near you!

I don't know if all of you guys heard (you probably did, though), but Apple Founder Steve Jobs died yesterday of Pancreatic Cancer.  He was a great visionary of our time and a wonderful man.  Even if you don not own a mac or use Apple products, you can still appreciate all that Steve has brought to the Teach universe (iPod, iPad, Mac, ect).  Rest in Peace Steve Jobs.

I dunno if you guys are interested, but sometimes I like to screw around in photoshop.  I post my random ass stuff here, if you have the need to me shocked and amazed by the sheer stupidity of my creations.

For those of you who haven't yet noticed, Minecraft updated to version 1.8 about two hours
ago!  Just start it on up and it'll download and you WILL enjoy it (or else).  If you find any
bugs (you will) or cool looking stuff (you definitely will), feel free to post it in reply to this
thread.  


Happy Mining!
UA Staff

If you haven't noticed already, I'm never on on the weekdays.  This is due to my busy weekday schedule, so don't expect any catposts until late Friday.

Four-score and 17 years ago our admins brought forth on this forum a new holiday, conceived in fur, and dedicated to the absolute fact that Humancatpost was created superior to all of mankind. We call this holiday National Humancatpost Day, and celebrate it by showering him with gifts (preferably steam games and TF2 items).

Make this Year's Catpost Day count!

Remember the date: November 6th